In the old and respectable line of disregard for shipping wars and serious shipping analysis, we introduce you now to the latest tool to the harmonian enjoyment of the upcoming Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince: the H/Hr shipping drinking game.
Mod Note For the H/Hr Drinking Game about fanfictions see this thread:
H/Hr Drinking Game, Have fun!
~MirtillaDisclaimer: Proceed only, and only if, you’re over 18 years old or your local legal age to drink alcohol and only if you don’t have to work next day. (*)
1. Take one sip if when you finally get hands on your brand new copy of HBP you notice that the jacket is red/burgundy and portraits Harry and Hermione either: flying in a Hippogriff together or fending off a dragon, or facing a sphinx or a herd of centaurs all by themselves. Take two drinks if they seem to be performing some kind of magical ritual coughchymicalweddingcough. –sorry, got a cold.
2. Take a drink if during the first extremely short chapter Harry ends up visiting for the first time ever the Grangers house. Use tequila, salt and lemon. (if you are Heron, drink a couple of aspirins with it).
3. Say here it comes again and laugh to yourself if Hermione meets Harry with a shout and a hug and they have a pet doing some happy gesture. Awwww….
4. If the latter happens, perform a little happy dance while gulping whisky and take a big gulp if any of the Grangers advice Harry to behave or assume without a good reason that Harry and Hermione may have something going on. Clean the splutter of whiskey you made on the page of the book. Think to yourself, with a start of a slur in your inner voice, that neither Harry nor Hermione need their bloody advise, they know how to behave themselves thank you very much.
5. Take another sip if Ron -God bless him- is unsuspicious and takes it very naturally. Let that be a double if it is only through owl because he is busy with the Order, and not in physical presence.
6. Erase the stupid grin from your face if you learn at any time of the book that it was under Dumbledore orders that Harry was sent to the Granger because he thought it was the best way for Harry to deal with his new problems. Sip your drink in deep meditation and nod.
7. Later, as inevitably as it is, Harry will talk to Hermione about Sirius death. If Hermione becomes emotional and touches Harry take another big gulp from the beer can --- remember to save the rest of the whiskey for upcoming chapters---.
8. If Harry takes advantage of this to mention the Prophecy take one drink. If Harry and Hermione are alone when he gives this big news, finish the whole can and take the champagne bottle from the cooler so it is closer to you.
9. If Hermione manages to reassure Harry that it wasn’t his fault or make him think later with the part of his head that talks with her voice, take another drink.
10. Take especial note of Harry’s dreams. Analyze carefully any in which Hermione is present. Take a drink if you manage to make some shipping sense out of it. If not, leave the bottle to one side and mark the page for later perusal.
11. Uh, go to the loo and then take a break to prepare a sandwich so as to resist better the rest of the liquor.
12. Well, now Harry meets Ginny after summer, he mentions her again as Ron’s little sister and forgets something important about her such as her being possessed by Voldemort or her playing Quidditch this year as chaser. If any of the latter happens take a drink and think to yourself that maybe you shouldn’t have drank to that with Guinness but with Budweiser, cause after all that is too normal and you didn’t expect any different anyway.
13. Harry meets the new DADA teacher and the character is unusually kind and sweet and develops a nice and especial relationship with both Harry and Hermione. Take a drink if that relationship does not include any other student that we know of.
14. The adventures start and Harry and Hermione have to use some kind of artifact that helps them but also separates them from everybody else: this item can include timeturners, invisibility cloaks, use of one sole broom, magical hand holding or use of vanishing cabinet. Realize you have a malicious smile on your lips and try to stop the fiendish laughter if the use of said magical instrument requires some kind of special touch such as plot-devise lip locking.
15. Tell your family it is Ok and that was a neighbor’s cat, not you who produced those scary sounds.
16. To tranquilize yourself take a gulp on the champagne bottle and check if its temperature is right. Since it isn’t, return it to the cooler.
17. Time goes by and Harry has his Quidditch practices. Take one sip if we learn that Ginny and Dean Thomas are an item and that he has taken up a place in the team. Take two sips if Hermione starts attending to Quidditch practices without a good reason. Take three sips if Harry actually realizes that she is doing it to prevent him from having quality time with any girl who plays on the team.
18. You can’t forget the plot-devise lip locking. Go to the sink and cool your face for a few minutes. Refuse to light a cigarette since you left those more than a year ago and you promised to yourself not to touch them again. No way.
19. Unplug your computer and throw the power cable through your window. There is no way you are logging in the COS Love Thread to talk about the kiss with your fellow harmonians *right now*. You finish the book first. Use your yoga breathing techniques to achieve concentration.
20. You return to the book and find new adventures that have Harry and Hermione blatantly touching over and over without realizing it. Take one drink for each time and take two drinks if they touch while looking at each other in the eye briefly.
21. Take one special drink if you find an instance in the book where Harry or Hermione laugh at each other’s remarks or jokes. Sigh in relief because Harry does need a little fun, poor thing!
22. After twenty chapters of plot development you finally find what you’ve really been looking for, the boy/girl stuff. You bring within your reach another pack of beer and hold your breath.
23. If Harry goes out with Ginny, have a coffee and tell to yourself that this is only plot advancement. Stop the trembling and take it like a man.
24. If instead Harry goes out with Luna, laugh to yourself and think that this is so much fun that you can enjoy it anyway. This is priceless! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
25. If Harry gets out with a new character, try to uncross your eyes, cause you’re too surprised and it sounds a little far fetched. Shrug in confusion and wonder if the new girl has anything remotely like good characterization. Find her pathetic in comparison with Hermione and be 100% sure that this is only a new tension to be added to the soon to explode H/Hr romance.
26. If Harry goes on a double date with Ginny and Ron and Hermione, try to lower the one eyebrow that got glued to your hair line and murmur to yourself: this is not happening, this is not happening….
27. If at the middle of any of the four aforementioned dates Harry escapes to go meet Hermione at the Three Broomsticks, the Shrieking Shack, the Forbidden Forest or Hagrid’s Hut and it is conveniently empty, take out the whiskey you were saving and empty the remains of the bottle. Think to yourself: This is it, now or never! Go for it girl!
28. If nothing happens sigh and think to yourself that you want it to be in book seven anyway. You’re a pleasure delayer and after all you got what you wanted when it was Mulder and Scully, although it took them eight years. Try to stop crying and hitting the pillow with your fists.
29. If the big moment does happen and our favorite romance starts with something like a big romantic confusion, an awkward kiss, a UST fight and tension, plus new found hormones, scream in glee, hug your teddy bear and jump repeatedly over the bed shouting: I told you so I f****** told you!!!!
30. Use the bottle of champagne to bathe yourself with it a la Formula 1 race winner. Run downstairs in pajamas and all wet to recover the power cable of the computer cause you need to get online right now!!!!
31. Go back to your room without the cable because somebody must have taken it. Hear the beating of your heart and think it is three am and you can get a new cable at 7.
32. Take the phone and call the only other harmonian you know in your city to try to talk about the victory of your ship. Act innocently when she tells you angrily that she was asleep and that she didn’t even know that the book was released that night. Smile condescendingly and with a maddening superior air when she tells you that you need HELP.
33. Take your phone book and remember all the heron you know in your city that you know are awake reading. Smile in an evil fashion at the thought of calling them to gloat. Tell to yourself: naahh. Redo your bed and continue reading while you open another can of beer and drink it with pleasure.
34. Grab the book and keep on reading now. Try not to laugh every two sentences.
35. In the next chapter Harry has a new adventure. If he goes out alone with Hermione although they are uncomfortable with each other, or confused by their recent romantic encounter take a drink.
36. If Hermione discovers the answer to the big plot scheme of the book or solves a riddle or important problem take two drinks
37. If Ron finally starts acting suspicious or angry about Hermione’s behavior to Harry, laugh to yourself and take two sips.
38. If the twins make a special entry that ends up in a hilarious way, take a sip even if it is not romantically related.
39. If Hermione has a go at the twins even if it is not romantically related take another sip, just because you love those two so dearly. They do know how to have a joke! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
40. If Hermione makes a mention of the next nature to Ron at any time during the book: I compare you to a teaspoon in any way/form, your gifts are unusual, you are insensitive or rude, I knew you would take it this way, I can have a penpal/boyfriend if I want and it can well be Krum/Terry Boot/Harry Potter, take a sip for each mention.
41. If Harry is jealous of Krum for some reason except under love potion effects, rub your eyes and wonder if they are not deceiving you. Chug away.
42. If Voldemort tries to reach Harry through Hermione take two drinks and brace yourself for some serious a**kicking of the former.
43. If any character known for its common sense and great intelligence is jealous or points once again towards H-Hr take a drink and say: join the club!
44. If the romantic aspect of the novel is left on the background towards the end accommodate yourself under the covers and prepare for some interesting fighting and subdued clues of oncoming romance.
45. If Harry saves Hermione once take one drink.
46. If Harry saves Hermione twice take four drinks.
47. If Harry saves Hermione twice and Hermione saves Harry at least once take eight drinks without breathing.
48. If towards the end of the book, after a new victory over Voldikins you find a nice and romantic line of foreshadowing such as Hermione getting the bride’s bouquet in a wedding, take the last drink of your last can and make mental note to get much more liquor when book seven is released cause this little didn’t last much.
49. If you are sleepy take a nap, if not, get up and count the number of times Harry and Hermione touched and make a nice graph to present next day to the COS LT. Make a mathematical progression with square minimums to prove that the horizontal pretzel will occur during the six/seventh portion of book 7 taking as a base the mounting evidence of the last six books with a 0.90 range of confidence , and
50. Prepare yourself for the longest and biggest online party of all times with apologies to Harmony collective liver.
(*) May replace liquor for butterbear or non-fat yogurt
Feel free to suggest or comment.
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Harmony: We have better parties!!!!
(although sugar and/or non-fat youghurt probably works just as well...) 
then the stocked alcohol could be used to drink yourself into denial that JK ever wrote the book and then proceed to write a drunkeny lemony H/Hr fanfic in replacement of said book.
Pass the drinks I will totally join you in your non-alcoholic drinking party. I hate being underage sometimes but, hey, its Harry Potter exceptions can be made (can't they? 
) But, then again maybe they shouldn't.... 
Yes that sounds good to me. And I'll be sure to have this list handy when I'm reading so I'll know when to take a big gulp! And I'll be totally sugar high at the time too so that's an added bonus! 
Well truthfuly I have two one HBP and two I will be 30 this year. 
Of course, then I'd probably either be dead or divorced before I turn 30, so maybe that's not a good idea after all.
)but I couldn't stop myself. I'm definitely going to try that butterbeer recipe. My friends and I tried to make some once but it was gross! Uh oh gotta go!!!!
I'm only 19(darn the drinking law). But also, yeah, drinking is baaaaad(I'm still reeling from a bad night of badness from a while ago where I've vowed never to drink again...not even for the love that is H/Hr!). 
He wants to read it first. I'm going to have to steal it. From him, that is. And I'll drink Dr/ Pepper with sugar added. several tons of sugar added. +is evil+
I hope we get a good recipe though.....i tried one and it was gross.....but at least i have a plan B! Break out the diet pepsi! 
~Ara~